Q: My husband and I have been having quite a few arguments lately. How can I defend our children from the negativity?
Megan
A: Megan: Well…IT DEPENDS. Certainly if there are aggressive and scary fights, you have a lot to be concerned about. If the two of you cannot control yourselves, you may want to find a professional to help you. If there is violence, you need to keep yourselves and the children safe. Perhaps temporary separation is needed. Violence should never be condoned. It is appropriate to call 911 and get the law involved as needed. It is not uncommon for children to experience levels of stress when parents participate in terrifying behaviors.
On the other hand, children do need to learn how to deal with conflict. There are of course negative and positive ways of managing said conflicts. I have worked with several adults who “never” heard their parents argue. These people are woefully unprepared to deal with conflicts in their own life.
So, yes…it depends.
Dr Tim
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